The Rev. Kathy Schmitz on November 11, 2007
At Pathways Church, A Unitarian Universalist Community in Southlake, Texas
As we look toward the future,
We give thanks for the past,
And the legacy we are blessed to continue.
May we live our lives so that they have mattered,
In large ways and in small,
In ways we may never know.
Rev. Kathy Schmitz
Earlier in the service, a dedication ceremony was held for the congregation’s new Tree of Life.
Reflection A Time to Remember
My remarks this morning will come in two parts – 2 reflections, with a ceremony of memory in between. The ceremony will include an opportunity to name, and light a candle in honor of, those close to you that have died within the last year. It will also include an opportunity to light a silent candle in memory of anyone who is on your mind this morning. But first, some thoughts.
Last summer, when the Congregational Care team asked about scheduling a dedication for the Tree of Life sometime in October, I recommended the end of the month. Many congregations have a time of remembrance at that phase of year. It is a time when many cultures pause to recognize those who have died. There is a confluence of such celebrations at the end of October, around the time that we know as Halloween.
There is Samhein, the holiday that marks the end of the harvest in Celtic tradition. It is the mid-point of Autumn, half-way between the Autumn Equinox and the Winter Solstice. It is celebrated in Neo-Pagan traditions as the New Year. It is the time when it is said that the veil between the world of the living and the world of the dead is the thinnest and when communication between the worlds is possible.
In the Christian tradition, we find All Saints Day and All Souls Day – one which prays for all those who have become saints and the other for those who, it is believed, are still in need of prayers to enter heaven. All Saints Day is November 1, and another word for saints in hallows. So, October 31 is “the eve of the Hallows” or Halloween. Thus, our modern celebration takes its names from the Christian tradition but many of it customs from the pre-Christian pagan traditions.
And then there is the Day of the Dead (Dia De Los Muertos), growing out of roots in the indigenous cultures of Mexico. It was once celebrated on a date in the Aztec calendar that would have fallen in early August. However, the Spanish, in an attempt to Christianize the celebration, moved it to coincide with All Saints and All Souls days.
And so the end of October seemed like a good time to dedicate a Tree of Life that would, among other things, honors the lives of those who have gone before. But, modern life being what it is, we had other demands on us for the weekend originally scheduled, so we find ourselves just slightly delayed in our dedication. And, by seeming coincidence, on Veterans Day. Another day to remember the importance of the service of some among us.
Of course, The Tree of Life will not just remember the lives of those who have passed on. It will honor many important transitions in life. Like the founders of this congregation. Like marriages and births and a host of other events that deserved to be marked and remembered. All those things will be held on its leaves and in its branches each week as you gather.
Still, it is important as well to set aside special times to honor the dead. Death is one of the few experiences of human existence with which we all must live. It can be hard to move from a time of grief to a time when we can honor and celebrate loved ones that have died. This challenge is captured in a story from the Buddhist tradition with which some of you may be familiar. It is said that….
The reputation of the Buddha had spread far and wide. He was renowned as a great, compassionate, and fully enlightened human being.
One day, a woman approached him after a teaching begging that he do something to restore her dead child to her. The Buddha listened patiently to her plea and saw how great was her despair. He said to her, "If you bring me just one mustard seed from any household in which no person has died, then I shall revive your child."
The woman was greatly encouraged by the Buddha’s words. She traveled from door to door throughout her own village, but could not find even a single residence in which no one had died. She went out of town, wandering to this hamlet and that in search of the tiny seed that the Buddha had requested. Days later, muddy and footsore, she returned to the place where the Buddha and his followers were passing the rainy season.
She was ushered into the Buddha’s presence worn out, but not discouraged. "Try as I might, I could not locate the token you requested as an offering. But I have come to understand that death visits every household and eventually, every single one of us.”
Thus the woman learned that death is part of the human experience.
This story was originally an intellectual story for me. People die. Over time it has become a faith story. Generations of humans have lived and died. And somehow death has been survived by those left behind. Though we continue to struggle with it, I now live with a deep faith that humans can survive the death of those they love. That they can once again know joy. And so I know, on my dreariest days, that I too can survive the death of those I love. That even when in this moment I cannot access it, there remains joy in the world. It is that faith in life, and in joy, that allows me to keep my heart open.
And so in our communities, we together recognize those that have gone before. To know that we are not alone. To know that in time we too can honor and celebrate the lives of those we have loved.
And so we take time to do that now.
Ceremony of Memory
For our ceremony this morning we have two beautiful tables created by Meryl Gunter. They are arranged to suggest aspects of the natural world.
People find solace in many places in the natural world. Some in the deep forest, others in the vast desert. Some turn to water to wash the tears of their grief, others stand high above the world on the mountain peak. Still others look beyond this planet to the sky, to the stars. (I noticed that the Spirit of Life session scheduled for after the service has a focus on spirituality and the natural world.)
Solace, and wisdom, and peace will be found in many places. As you come forward to light a candle, I invite you to place it in a location that speaks to your spirit or reminds you of the person who you honor.
Introduction
Our Ceremony of Memory will have two parts. After an initial reading, I will invite those who would like to remember someone who died in the last year to come forward and light a candle in their memory and then to say their name.
After we have remembered and named those who have died in the last year, I will invite those who wish to remember someone else, who may have died more than a year ago, to come forward and light a candle in silence. We will close the ceremony with a reading.
Reading – from Kathleen McTigue (Beyond Absence, by Edward Searl, page 173)
First Invitation
Those who wish to remember someone who has died in the last year are invited to come forward at this time. You will find candles in the center. After lighting and placing your candle step to the microphone to speak the name.
(People come forward)
From A Prayer by Kathy Schmitz
All around us nature speaks of change.
Of beginnings and endings.
Of birth and death.
Of cycles. Of life.
May we find peace in our understanding
of the great cycle of life of which we are,
for a small while, privileged to be a part.
Second Invitation
When it comes to the influences of those now gone from us, our memories span years. Please come forward at this time to light a silent candle in memory of someone who is on your mind this morning.
(soft music as people come forward)
Reading – from Lynn Thomas Strauss (Beyond Absence, by Edward Searl, page 187)
Reflection In Memory Of…
Sometimes we think that we in our generation are completely unique.
That somehow we emerged from the universe uninfluenced by all that has happened before. Yet, the past matters. It is what has brought us to where we are today.
There is a school of theology, known as Process Theology that holds up the importance of this “unfolding of the universe.”
The people who write about Process Theology are called Process Theologians and here is what they would say about the power of the universe that some people call God.
God is a process, more of verb more than a noun.
We, each of us individually, and humanity as a whole, are strands in the vast unfolding of the universe.
We are Co-Creators of the universe with God
That’s what the Process Theologians might say.
Each moment is full of creative potential.
Each moment with
which we are presented has many possibilities – possibilities to create
different futures.
Process theology suggests to us
That history matters – but it is not all that matters.
We are not all that matters either – but we do matter.
The choices we make, the things that we do, these things matter.
For just as the choices made by others,
known and unknown in the past,
influence our world today,
we are called to recognize our place as co-creators of the universe,
for our choices become part of the history that the future will know.
Please join me as I close with a time of reflection.
On This Day by Kathy Schmitz, originally for Memorial Day 1998 (adapted)
On this day,
We have paused to remember
Those who have come before us –
Those who have helped to bring us to where we are today –
Members of our families
Members of this community
Friends and neighbors
Leaders of women and men
On this day
Let us have a special silence for those whose names are lost to us,
And lost to history,
But whose efforts, large and small, have mattered –
In ways we will never know.
Today
As we look toward the future,
We give thanks for the past,
And the legacy we are blessed to continue.
May we live our lives so that they have mattered,
In large ways and in small,
In ways we may never know.